Change vs. Transformation

“Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly.”

– English Proverb

What is transformation? How is it different than change?

Humans often do not like change, even when it promises positive things or is willingly-brought. Why is that?

Change is external; it implies something happening to us. It threatens our equilibrium, our experience, our rhythm and balance, all of which human beings are neurologically geared to preserve for survival. When faced with -especially unexpected- change, we fight, flight or freeze. In other words, we deal with, run away from, or hold still against change, aiming to restore our fundamental sense of balance.

Change applauds survival. Once the change is weathered and equilibrium is re-established, we are often praised for our resilience. “You are so strong”, others say; “You survived that bad boss/ illness/ divorce/ move”; "You are doing/ looking great, despite the change"; You are the same as before"; “You have thick skin”. The implication almost always is, "you went through all that, you survived, and look, you are still the same you". The more unchanged, unaffected you, as a person, come out of the life change, the better you score. Change credits restoring the past you. It does NOT want you to change, with the change. If you succeed to restore your essence as before, change crowns you as the admired survivor of your past storms.

A nuance that is often lost in social interpretation of change, however, is that we ourselves do change with the external change. Every time, we are disturbed out of our balance and then restore it back, we are a slightly (or majorly) different version of ourselves. The sense of equilibrium might have been restored back, but it is not possible to restore ourselves back, exactly as we were before. Our thoughts, emotions, body, frame of reference, personality, beliefs, and outlook will change with every change, despite the social expectations.

Transformation focuses on how we change, with the change. It takes 'external change changing you' as a given, and is interested in its direction. Transformation, therefore, challenges us to thrive -not just to survive- through the change.

Transformation has agency. It happens in us, by us, for us. Transformation demands us to use the change-however big, small, scary, wonderful, unknown, tragic, lucky it may be- to shape and create evolved and elevated versions of ourselves, with intention and direction. It is what we choose to make of the change, inside ourselves, for ourselves.

Transformation has purpose. While it takes a lot of courage, willingness, and dedication to commit to continuous transformation, the gift is an elevated, liberated, more authentic, more able, happier, fulfilled, fluid, purposeful you. Committing to continuous transformation allows you to live, to love, to succeed, to enjoy better and fuller. Transformation is hard work, yet it will be the best thing you will ever have done.

Change is inevitable. Transformation is optional, by conscious choice.

So, what is it for you today, wonderful people, to survive or to thrive?